A lot of people say to me “Bunny, why would I pay upwards of $100 on a sex toy? I mean, it’s just going on/in my dirty bits anyway.”
First of all, I hope you have a more discerning attitude when it comes to sexual partners. Secondly, higher end items can make a world of difference!
Most inexpensive toys run anywhere from $15 to $40. They are a great way to start out and see what you like, but the majority of cheaper toys are just that, cheap. They’re generally made with less body-friendly ingredients (parabens, look them up), they smell like cabbage patch kids and they require batteries so you end up spending more than the original price in the long run.
While I can understand an impromptu visit to your local sex toy shoppe after an especially good night out with someone cute, I say if you’ve had a couple of fun experiences with lower-end toys it’s time to graduate to the big leagues.
I find that Lelo really makes my bunny hop, and Smitten on Osborne has the widest Lelo selection in town. Also, ask your favourite Village dildo peddler about other brands such as We-Vibe, Sensuelle, OhMiBod, Fun Factory and more.
Tired of being limited to pink or purple? Lelo thinks outside the box (and inside the box) with a plethora of Popsicle Pete-inspired hues. The silicone they use is high quality with a silky smooth finish, and is much less likely to harbour bacteria than more porous materials.
What’s groovy about Lelo is that you can cycle through settings and turn the vibrations up or down for each one. Many beginner toys that feature pulsations are at a preset intensity, making it difficult to find something that feels just right. It’s usually a good idea to buy something that has the option to go too powerful for your liking, as you may feel a little adventurous one day after getting used to those medium level vibes.
The majority of less expensive vibrators feature a dial to go from their lowest to highest setting. Usually dial control toys give you a choice between barely there and an aggressive tickle. If you are on a budget, ask for a toy with button control.
Another factor to consider is sound. For those of us in a communal living arrangement, a swarm of angry bees in your bedroom is going to get people talking. Lelo hums softly like tiny orgasm angels and leaves your vocalizations in the spotlight where they belong.
The best thing about Lelo is that they stand by their products. Your new plaything comes with a one year warranty and a 10-year guarantee for half the original price off of a new toy, a better deal than most prenups.
Considering the fact that most $40 toys will last less than a year (if you’re doing it right), it just makes sense to spend more now on a sex tool you can count on later. Your dad would be proud.
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Published in Volume 68, Number 24 of The Uniter (March 19, 2014)