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Director Zack Snyder’s 2006 feature 300 has always been a problematic film for me. I appreciate the movie’s bold stylistic choices, with a unique visual approach employing fantastical shot compositions and artful tableaus. On the other hand, the film’s ideology was troubling: borderline-fascistic Spartans were glorified as heroes, while the villainous Persians were full-blown racist caricatures. Does this represent the subjective view of 300’s characters, or is it the view of Snyder (or, more likely, the despicable Frank Miller, whose comic series the film was based upon)?

I bring this up because, for all the problems of the original 300, at least it was engaging enough to inspire conflicted feelings and real discussion amongst its audience. 300: Rise of an Empire is a sort-of sequel/prequel/spinoff/whatever to 300, and it’s far too dumb to inspire any feelings, conflicted or otherwise.

There’s a lot to complain about in 300: Rise of an Empire, but it’s hard to get worked up enough to complain about a movie that made me feel nothing. The film is filled with cartoonish gore, video game visuals, rampant misogyny, and not an ounce of creativity. But how can I be upset about the movie’s gratuitous violence or nudity when its very existence is gratuitous?

Director Noam Murro (whose only previous feature was 2008’s lacklustre Smart People) does nothing with this material. He apes the style of the original to the point of self-parody. And, trust me, it’s not intentional or self-aware. Rise of an Empire has no characters, just interchangeable shirtless men in helmets, indistinguishable from one another. The writing is like a bad sitcom, but instead of setting up lame jokes, the dialogue sets up lame one-liners. The colour palette is grey and monochromatic. The striking visuals of 300 are lost in muddied 3D.

This sequel’s greatest sin is that it instigated my complete indifference, and nothing else. I felt nothing from the opening moments to the meatheaded ending. It made me appreciate the original 300, which is a movie I can’t even say I like.