Scotch on Antarctica rocks

CAPE ROYDS, Antarctica: Two crates of Scotch, abandoned during Ernest Shackleton’s 1907-1909 Antarctic expedition, were recovered from a hut at Cape Royds. The McKinlay & Co. scotch was initially found three years ago and the ice-encased crates will be removed by the New Zealand Antarctic Heritage Trust. Shackleton’s South Pole expedition was abandoned in March 1909 as the winter ice started forming at sea. The team fell 160 kilometres short of reaching the South Pole. In the team’s haste, they left equipment and supplies in addition to the cases of Scotch. According to BBC News, distillers Whyte and Mackay, makers of the McKinlay brand, are eager to gain access to the bottles in the hopes of gaining a sample of the extinct Scotch. The firm’s master blender would like to attempt recreating the blend. Trust spokesperson Al Fastier said he did not plan on tasting the Scotch, preferring to leave the century-old bottles and let them preserve their South Pole mystique.

U.S. Postal Service cancels Christmas

NORTH POLE, Alaska: The U.S. Postal Service is discontinuing its Operation Santa program in the northern city after a registered sex offender was discovered volunteering at the Operation Santa program in Maryland. A postal worker recognized the pedophile and intervened before the person could respond to the child’s letter. The volunteers in the city of North Pole have answered the letters addressed to “Santa Claus, North Pole” since 1954. North Pole is located near Fairbanks, Alaska and has streets named Kris Kringle Drive and Santa Claus Lane, and even has light stands resembling candy canes. The Associated Press reported the postal service said it will continue to run its national Operation Santa program in other cities but letters will no longer be returned with “North Pole” postmark. Volunteers were still answering the letters but their responsibilities will cease unless the program is re-instated before Christmas.

Vagrants kill man and sell parts to kebab house

PERM, Russia: Three homeless men were arrested after police suspected they killed, ate and sold another homeless man to a kebab house. Police began investigating the crime after dismembered body parts were found near a bus stop in the city. The three men had previous criminal records. According to Reuters, the police department released a statement saying they believed the three men set upon the other man with knives and a hammer, chopping him up, eating a portion and selling other parts to a kiosk for kebabs and pies. The statement did not reveal whether kebab customers had also consumed the man.

Woman uses Facebook to find assailant

HERTFORDSHIRE COUNTY, England: A British woman used Facebook to find the person who slammed a glass in her face. Twenty-year old Jennifer Wilson was assaulted by another woman at a club, leaving Wilson with an inch-long bleeding gash below her eye. The attack was unprovoked. According to CBC News, Wilson recognized some of her assailant’s friends on Facebook and was able to track down Ashleigh Holliman by that means, searching through friends until successful. She provided Holliman’s name to police. Ashleigh Holliman admitted to the crime and was sentenced to serve 120 hours of community service.

Published in Volume 64, Number 13 of The Uniter (November 26, 2009)