If the answer is marijuana, the unification of North America and good spelling, then the question is: What does the Peace Maker Society like, not like and not practice?

I found out about PMS (a memorable acronym if I ever heard one) by coming across one of their cards discarded on the ground. I love finding cards and this one proved to be a real gem.

The card starts out with the ambiguously English sentence “100% Legal 4 Green,” then goes on to list an affidavit number and misspell Stephen Harper’s name (giving him the francophone-sounding Stephan). It’s also typeset so badly that the text is abruptly cut off at the bottom.

This was just my first impression of the group and I immediately wanted to learn more. I met with PMS founder Marcel “Marc” Bessette a few days later.

Bessette told me with pride that he has an IQ in the 130s and that he has several “geniuses” working with him. He also told me he smokes a quarter-ounce of weed a day. Really.

That was one of the few things in our conversation that I understood. The rest of the time he talked so fast that a hummingbird would get dizzy, all the while his eyes bugged open eerily. They weren’t even red.

Bessette told me that PMS is a sovereign, self-governing society distinct from Canada who are also trying to save the country. While their literature lists legal marijuana as their passion, Bessette says their main focus is to prevent a North American Union.

This is the idea that Canada, the U.S. and Mexico will erase their borders. Bessette says this will happen within a year without the interference of the PMS. Never mind that the U.S. is still building that fence to keep the Mexicans out and it’s getting harder every year for Canadians to travel south of the border without copious identification.

He told me that within a year, he will have opened satellite offices in “every Canadian city” and will have gathered the signatures of 51 per cent of the entire country to protest this union.

Whoever said stoners were lazy?

Acting under a claim of right, filed on Sept. 3 of this year, Bessette believes he and anyone in his society are exempted from Canadian law. This is a real thing, and it seems to be at least partially true in this case. Ask him how he did it, if you can understand him.

On their Facebook group page, Bessette (under the name Marc Zurawell) mentions talking with the Winnipeg Police Service recently. I contacted WPS and asked if they were conducting an investigation. Terry Kolbuck, WPS Public Information Assistant would only tell me that they weren’t. So far, so good, PMS-ers!

Also on the Facebook page is a small debate sparked by a potential member questioning some of the confusing information. Bessette got tired of defending himself after two responses and said, “You are no longer welcome in our society… so good luck to you.” He goes on to say, “I get tired of explaining to people that are too stupid to understand.”

Who says weed makes you unsociable?

PMS seems to be onto something really interesting, but it’s hard to take them seriously with their far-fetched goals and manic drug use.

I look forward to being banned from joining.

Andrew McMonagle is a University of Winnipeg student.

Published in Volume 64, Number 6 of The Uniter (October 8, 2009)