Being the keen observer of the human condition that I am, I’ve noticed a pretty interesting correlation in our society between two really amazing things: puppies and boobs.
The other day, I met a girl who knew who I was.
This week, I’d like to take the chance to talk to you about a very addictive (and, therefore, very dangerous) Christmas treat that has taken me in with its seductive siren song and has, just as quickly, chewed me up and spit me out.
This week, I’d like to take the time to talk to you all about an affliction that has taken the lives of too many modern day heroes and has to be stopped. The disease I’m speaking of is Hungry Bum Syndrome (HBS) and it’s killing more and more North Americans every year.
This week, I’d like to address a subject that might prove somewhat dicey or contentious, given the medium I’m choosing to express it. The subject is the complete bias and corruption of the media.
Something has really been pissing me off lately and, since I’m not one to pussyfoot, I’m just going to come right out and say it: I’m sick and tired of our goddamn government funding the goddamn arts!
I’ve decided that I’ve been a lazy, good-for-nothing parasite, leeching off of the belly of our society for long enough.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I fucking hate The Family Circus.
In order to stick with the theme of this week’s Uniter, I’d like to talk about something very near and dear to my own heart: religion.
Even those of us who think we are well informed are actually a lot dumber than we think.
Birthdays are a funny thing. Once a year, those of us who celebrate our birthdays throw a party to mark the passing of another year of our lives.
Well, as the leaves change colour from green to gold and red, and the hot summer sun gives way to a hint of winter chills to come, it is clear that autumn is upon us.
And with the coming of autumn, we can be sure that another annual visitor will be sure to follow. I’m speaking, of course, about robot grizzlies.
If you are reading this right now, it means that I will have played my last weekly show at Shannon’s Irish Pub.
I’m partway into my second year of the creative communications program at Red River College, and I’m learning some really interesting things.
Like most Winnipeggers, I love our fair city with all my heart.
So I’ve been thinking a lot lately about myself as a consumer.
In case you’ve been living under a rock for the last few months (or are one of the approximately seven billion people who don’t live in Winnipeg, and would therefore have no reason to care), there is a civic election scheduled in Winnipeg for Oct. 27, 2010.
I heard recently from a friend that there’s a new trend popular with teenaged girls which involves them soaking tampons in vodka and inserting them into their vaginas. This way, they believe, they’ll get drunker faster.
So this week, I’d like to provide a detailed description of the “runner’s high” to hopefully entice all of you into taking up the fun and exciting pass time of running.
Ever since Al Gore started whining like a little bitch, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about the best way for us to get around without clogging up the atmosphere with carbon emissions or clogging up the streets with horse poo.